Soul Guardian - Chapter 34: Double Bluff

My grandfather is very eccentric, performing daily rituals of offering incense to himself, standing in front of his own spirit tablet and eating candles.Villagers are fearful of my grandfather.I am fearful of him too.Later, I discovered that what they were afraid of was not my grandfather, but me.Even grandfather is afraid of me....My name is Chen Shi.The Chen of honesty, the Shi of sincerity.

I was transmigrated into a work I liked and finally came back.But after, I was dragged into an Academy Romance Novel, which I skipped over after only reading the prologue.There I found a half-broken possessors who regressed endlessly.

“Devouring Lifespan to grow stronger!!”When Ricky Stormwind—a washed-up office worker—drank himself to death, he expected eternal nothingness. Instead, he awoke in a new world… as a mosquito.Weak as an ant. Fragile as a piece of paper. Prey to everything.But this world is no ordinary one. Magic, monsters, and powerful beings dominate the land, with ruthless forces waging war for supremacy. And Ricky? He possesses a terrifying ability—he can drain lifespan from any living creature and use it to evolve.A single bite can grant him hours. A feast?..... Years!!Now, in a forest filled with predators and beside a village on the brink of destruction, Ricky must climb the evolutionary ladder—from insignificant pest to a calamity that could devour the world itself.But when his first real meal triggers a mass sacrifice, the world mistakes him for a rising Demon Lord. Bounties are placed on his head. Armies march to hunt him down. And lurking in the shadows, a forbidden power calls to him, promising a path beyond mere survival—one that could reshape reality itself.In a world where everything is prey to something greater, something horrendous… he will rise to become the apex.

I found myself in a parallel universe, awakening as a male priest. Everything seemed perfect; after all, as a healer, specializing in aiding women should pose no issue, right? However, I couldn’t help but wonder about some peculiar spells in my repertoire.

Firstly, what in the world is the “Instantaneous Outbreak of Acute Gastroenteritis” spell? And don’t even get me started on the “Osteoporosis” spell. What purpose could these serve in my healing endeavors? The confusion only deepened with spells like “Blood Burn,” “Gradual Freeze,” and “Mental Chaos.” Can I still peacefully focus on healing women with such ominous abilities?

Comparing my spells to those of other professions, I couldn’t help but notice the stark contrast. Mages wield “Doomstorm” and “Ice Age,” swordsmen boast “Sword Rain: Homecoming” and “Wind-Cutter Slash,” while archers showcase “Arrow Rain: Shooting Stars” and “Storm Arrow.” Yet, my ultimate spells are disturbingly named “Cancer Cell Proliferation,” “T-Virus Infection,” and “Rabies Outbreak.”

In the midst of it all, a certain character, some crying girl, laments, “Noooo, I just took a bath, who would have thought that I would become infected!”

Meanwhile, a villain chillingly asks, “Do any of you know what it feels like to burst apart while spouting blood? No! You don’t know!”

Even a boss character confesses, “Dear family, who can understand? I just took a nap, and when I woke up, I suddenly found that I have no kidneys!”