ISEKAI? More like I See Crap!-Chapter 125: Wandering with Ridan ( )

"Hey," Ridan said, floating sideways. "Check the coin bag you got from that tiger guy."

"Huh?" Hazuki blinked. "Oh yeah... now I remember..."

He hummed a little tune while reaching back into the magic bag, fishing around for a moment before pulling out a heavy coin pouch.

He unfastened the string and peeked inside—his eyes went wide.

"Wooooo!" he shouted. "There’s one gold coin in here! And—whoa—several silver coins... and even some copper! Damn!!"

Ridan floated nearby, arms folded like a cloud with an attitude. "Not even counting what we got from the vine demon. You know, the one with the tentacle fetish."

Hazuki nodded, already imagining piles of food and a nice inn bed. "Yeah... right. We’re stacked right now."

"All thanks to me, right?" Ridan puffed up proudly, his cloud-body glowing a little brighter.

Hazuki gave him a lazy side glance. "Yeah, yeah..."

Ridan smirked. "You could at least say it with more gratitude."

"I will," Hazuki muttered, stuffing the pouch back into the magic bag. "The day you stop stealing soup steam from my breakfast."

"Cheapskate."

Hazuki leaned back in his chair, still riding the high of a full belly and a surprisingly heavy coin pouch.

"I got seven gold coins, plus several silver and copper, sitting in my bank account already," he grinned, tapping his Adventurer Card proudly.

"And with this money," he patted the freshly recovered pouch from the tiger beastfolk, "**and the loot we sell later—hehehehe—**more money for my bank account!!"

Ridan floated beside him, unimpressed. "You laugh like a villain who just robbed a fruit stand."

"Hey, don’t ruin the moment."

Hazuki straightened in his seat. "Right, first things first—OWNER!!"

The beastkin shop owner peeked out, already used to Hazuki’s volume. "Yes, yes... what now?"

"How much for everything?" Hazuki asked, flipping his pouch open.

The owner rubbed his chin. "Let’s see... one bowl of noodles is 10 copper. You had two—that’s 20. Coffee was 6 copper. So 26 copper total."

"HUH!? Expensive!!" Hazuki cried.

"Oi! My stall’s the cheapest around!" the owner shot back. "Try buying breakfast in the noble quarter! You’ll cough up a silver for salt!"

Hazuki groaned. "Damn capital city pricing..."

Still, he dug into his pouch and handed over the coins. "Here," he muttered. "Don’t say I don’t support local businesses."

The owner took the coins calmly and gave a quick nod. "Thank you, customer."

"Yeah, yeah... you’re welcome..."

Hazuki stood up and stretched again.

Ridan floated in lazy circles around him. "Alright, cash boy. Let’s sell that loot next."

Hazuki grinned. "Money, here we come!"

Hazuki adjusted the strap of his bag and looked down the street, noticing the morning crowd starting to thicken.

"Now... where should we go?" he muttered.

"Bank! Or the merchant guild! Or the adventurer guild!!" Ridan suddenly shouted, spinning mid-air with exaggerated excitement.

Hazuki flinched. "Oi! Are you a kid!? Why are you yelling like that!?"

"Huh? Of course not," Ridan snorted. "But it’s better than floating around like a ghost lamp while you sleep and snore like a dying bear!"

Hazuki froze. "Oh..."

"Heh. No comeback, huh?" Ridan smirked.

"Shut up, pervert spirit!"

"Boooo~ Boooo~" Ridan began circling him, arms raised like a wobbly ghost, trying to "haunt" the passersby who, of course, couldn’t see or hear him.

Hazuki sighed as a beastkin woman gave him a strange look and quickly ushered her child away.

"Great. Now I look insane again."

"Good! I like when you look insane. It keeps expectations low," Ridan cackled, doing a loop-de-loop above him.

Hazuki groaned. "Fine, fine... let’s hit the merchant guild first and sell that loot. Then I’ll think about going to the bank, and if I feel like it, we’ll check the adventurer guild."

"Oho~ Look who’s finally making grown-up decisions."

"I’ll shove you back in the sword." freewebnσvel.cøm

"You wouldn’t dare. I know your search history."

"YOU CAN SEE THAT!?"

He wiggled in midair mockingly. "You know... those files you tried to hide. From before you got isekai’d."

Hazuki rubbed his face, groaning. "I’m a man, okay!? A man with needs!! It’s not like this world has smartphones! Or the internet!!"

He laughed awkwardly, trying to brush off his shame as they passed by a fruit stand. Ridan floated above him with a dramatic sigh.

"Back in my day, men just carved ’tut’ into cave walls."

"Shut it, ancient spirit."

They strolled further before Hazuki suddenly paused, realizing something.

"By the way, Ridan."

"Hmm?"

"...It’s still early morning, right? I don’t think the adventurer guild, merchant guild, or even the bank is open yet!"

Ridan stopped mid-float. "Yeah, dumbass."

Hazuki squinted. "THEN WHY did you suggest we go to those places!?"

"Hmm?" Ridan shrugged midair. "I dunno. I was bored."

Hazuki stared at him blankly. "...You are the worst."

Ridan stretched like a floating fog pillow. "And yet here you are. Alive."

Hazuki sighed. "...Guess I’ll just kill time until the places open."

Ridan spun around. "Hey, wanna buy more food?"

"Stop trying to eat through me."

As they wandered past a sleepy row of closed stalls, Hazuki glanced up at Ridan, who was slowly spinning overhead like a bored weather balloon.

"By the way, Ridan."

"Hmm?"

"You remember anything from... you know... before you were sealed?"

Ridan blinked. "What do you mean?"

"I mean like... were you a spirit from the start? Or were you a living being first?"

"Ehh..." Ridan shrugged mid-air. "I dunno, man. It’s all kinda fuzzy. Long time ago."

Hazuki raised an eyebrow. "Girl or guy?"

"Guy," Ridan answered casually.

Hazuki’s eyes lit up with wicked glee. "Oho~! You into guys? Pervert spirit~!"

"OI!!" Ridan snapped. "I thought you were asking about my gender before I became a spirit!!"

Hazuki laughed out loud, nearly doubling over.

"BAHAHAHAHA! Oh man, you walked right into that one!"

"You set me up, you little weasel!"

"You confessed, perv-puffball!"

"I WILL STEAL YOUR SOUP AGAIN."

"I DARE YOU."

Across the street, a shopkeeper slowly lowered his broom, staring at Hazuki laughing and yelling into the air.

As they strolled along a wider street lined with morning shops, Ridan suddenly paused, eyes gleaming with mischief.

He smirked. "Ohhh, my poor ’master’~," he said dramatically. "Bound by the sacred pinky promise..."

Hazuki blinked. "Huh?"

"See over there?" Ridan floated a bit lower, nodding toward a discreet but elegant building with red lanterns by the door, where a fluffy-tailed foxgirl gently waved at passersby.

"That’s a special place," Ridan said, voice dripping with fake sympathy. "For men like you~"

Hazuki’s eyes twitched. "...Is that a—?"

"Yup. Brothel." Ridan grinned. "But poor you~ Can’t even ogle other girls anymore—Bwahahahahah!!"

"Shut up!" Hazuki growled, his face already turning red.

"Poor guy~ must be enduring sooo much hardship~ Can’t chase skirts, can’t peek in bathhouses, can’t even flirt without divine backlash~" Ridan twirled smugly in the air.

Hazuki huffed, cheeks puffed. "Ugh! Whatever! I’ll just wait until Ellyn grows up and marry her!"

He stuck out his tongue at Ridan like a sulking kid.

Ridan cackled harder. "PFFT! That’s your big plan!? You gonna wait eight years and then be like, ’Hey, remember that time you sat on my head?’"

Hazuki crossed his arms. "Yup. Romantic, right?"

"You’re insane."

"I’m committed."

"You’re cursed."

"Also that."

They both fell silent for a moment—then Hazuki glanced at the brothel again and sighed.

( End of Chapter )