SSS-Class Revival Hunter-Chapter 173: The Holy Land War (3)

Why is life so unfair?

Perhaps this was the karma parents had to bear. If their child did a good job, it was the child’s accomplishment. However, when the child did a bad job, it was the parents’ fault.

Aaaah, Raviel. It’ll be better for us not to have children. I’m not sure I can endure it if a child that looks like you says, “Fuck, Dad!” Huh? Wait, that may be cute in its own way...

—You crazy bastard. Love didn’t blind your eyes. It blindfolded you, and someone smacked you in the back of the head. That must be why you have some missing screws...

Ignoring the Guardian’s sarcastic comment, I imagined a happy future and checked the status of newly evolved Terras.

Show me the species status window.

Terra

Extinction risk level: C (Safe)

Motto: “We are fire.”

Political system: Republic.

Description: What in the world happened? Terras have gone through an amazing evolution, building a very special civilization. Their civilization greatly values aura!

Terras consider that one of their own has reached adulthood once they learn how to use their aura. Politicians, artists, warriors... No matter a goblin’s occupation, success depends on whether they can use aura.

As soon as Terras master aura, they become members of the Fire Water Council starting from the next full moon. Terras that use aura are seen as adults, citizens, and councilmen.

All adult Terras participate in the council. All major and minor matters of the species are decided there.

Ranking within the council is based on how skilled a Terra is when it comes to using their aura. Naturally, the chairman is the most proficient in using aura among Terras.

“Fuckgor.”

In short, the strongest goblin is the leader! On quiet nights when the full moon is bright, Terras gather, their ugliness and hideous buck teeth indistinguishable in the darkness. As the cool night air envelops them, they solemnly discuss the fate of their species.

“Chairman, no matter how much I think about it, I don’t think this is a good solution.”

“You have a problem ”

“I do.”

“Then bring it on.”

“So be it.”

Even though all Terra adults come together to make a decision on their agendas, the Fire Water Council is surprisingly efficient and speedy. This feat is possible because the chairman is the strongest warrior of their species. It’s unbelievable that such a savage warrior species exists.

It may be time for whoever created this species to reflect upon their actions!

Traits: Traditional Republican, Scummy Friend Doctrine, Motherfucking Aura Teaching, Cavefire, Legacy of Record, Competitive Spirit.

Evolved Form: Unknown.

—Terras have one evolution left until the final evolved form.

Other names: Hobgoblin.

Hmm. Umm. Okay. Wow, the goblins evolved into hobgoblins! Great! That’s stylish!

—Zombie, is that all you have to say about this?

I buried my head in my hands. Damn, how did this happen? Really, I just helped them change Maximum Greed into a positive thing and made sure they would not lose Cavefire!

—Well, positive doesn’t necessarily mean sane.

N-no, my teaching method wasn’t wrong. Now that I think about it, this means at least a few hundred Terras know how to use aura. Maybe there are thousands. That’s awesome, right? It’s awesome, yeah. Although I didn’t expect this to happen, it’s a happy little accident, not a mistake. This is who I am. This is what I’m capable of.

—You've reached the parenting stage where you fail to let go of your parenting methods, you bastard.

I read through the traits of Terras. Six hundred years was a long time. Now, they had additional traits that they didn’t have before, like Traditional Republican.

Traditional Republican

Category: Politics

Origin: Cavefire

Description: Terras have established a republic. This republican system originated from the unique funeral tradition of Terras!

When one of their kin died, Terras gathered in an underground cave and held a meeting. The underground cave was so dark that it made each Terra’s outline indistinguishable from the darkness. Although Terras held funerals in that way only to escape the oppression and surveillance of Shellmounts, they were under the constant embrace of darkness.

In the dark, Terras discussed freely.

“How did our kin die?’”

History.

“Did they live a good life?”

Trial.

“How should we react to this death?”

Ethicality.

“Is Kekerukker a son of a lion or a son of a bi—”

Philosophy.

As time passed, Terras began to discuss not only the dead but also the living. After escaping from the underground city, they held meetings every time the old moon set. Naturally, the issues agreed upon during the meeting were regarded as the consensus of the entire Terras. The attendees became a council.

Unlike other councils, words are not important.

“Ugor. What a pity. There seems to be a significant difference between our perspectives on the matter.”

“If you crush your opponent’s eyes, that will help abridge the difference in perspectives.”

“That sounds like a great solution.”

Survival of the strongest! In a sense, the council of Terras is still a funeral home!

※ This trait may change depending on how history unfolds.

This trait mentioned some... bizarre things, to say the least.

It’s the principle where the strongest is always right, but it isn’t a dictatorship. Although the guys have a council, their ranking is determined by force rather than eloquence. What the...? Something... something doesn’t feel right...

The Guardian clicked his tongue.

—Isn’t this the result of your teachings? You talk first, then throw punches next. Or you’ll talk, but you’ll still use your fists too. This is perfect. They’re your replicas, Kim Zombie.

This... is who I really am?

—Yup. Parents get to know themselves while raising their children.

It was shocking. It seemed I was more of a bulldozer than I originally thought.

The Sword Star looked at the field. “Hmm. As expected from the Death King’s species, they’re very good at fighting. This is already the third duel, but the Terras are winning without sending out more fighters. The gap in martial arts proficiency doesn’t seem that big, but the aura mastery of the two sides seems very different.”

Like the Sword Star said, the duels continued. Both the allied forces and the Shellmounts took turns sending out their fighters. However, the Terra warriors won every duel.

The Black Witch muttered, “I see. I’ve been underestimating them because they’re goblins but, unlike their appearance, they use their aura very elegantly.”

“Ahem.”

“Death King, why are you holding your nose high? It’s not a pleasant sight, so please drop it. As the person in charge of your clothes, it’s a little despairing.”

“My children are doing well, so I can’t help feeling proud of them. Speaking of clothes, Black Dragon Master, why do I have to wear black leather clothes like these ones? I look like I’m suffering from main character syndrome. I did a bit of research on the Internet, and it looks like people either hate or love my clothes,” I complained.

“It’s okay. Leather suits you.”

“Are your preferences being reflected in my clothes, by any chance?”

Feigning innocence, the Black Witch calmly said, “No way. I just chose clothes that fit you. There were no selfish interests in my choices.”

My suspicions grew.

“Damn fungi bastards!”

The leaders of the allied forces gritted their teeth, trembling with anger. They had sent out fighters throughout the night, but the win-lose ratio was very bad.

“For every four of our allies dying, only one Terra dies,” the Bloodborn lamented. “Only elite soldiers have been selected to become vanguards... Even so, they’re barely winning.”

The leaders of the multi-species alliance were blazing with anger.

“The same is happening on the Shellmount side. Shit. The Terras planted themselves in the middle of the battlefield.”

“Are we just going to play along with the fungi? We’re on a crusade and are following the will of the gods! We must ignore the fungi and mobilize our entire armies for an all-out attack on Slimepolis!”

“So you’re saying you’re going to declare war on Terras? That’s foolish.”

“What? How is that foolish?”

“Even if you impulsively rush in, only the Shellmounts will benefit. The fungi already told us they’re just the vanguards. The Great King of Terras, the chairman, is on the way with the main army. According to legend, the Great King of Terras is a monster that can block waterways and smother fires on his own. If a force led by such a monster attacks us, there is just no way out of it.”

The vampire bitterly looked at the duels taking place.

“The Shellmounts on one side, the Terras on the other... There is just no way to go on with this war. The good news is that the Shellmounts probably reached the same conclusion. This is a stalemate.”

“Then what do you suggest we do here?” the Skian commander asked, clenching his fists in anger.

Skian was the species the Shellmounts had oppressed for the longest time, so the Skians' hatred ran very deep.

He added, “Slimepolis is on the brink of destruction. We made this possible, so are we seriously going to give up like this? What about the costs of mobilizing the expeditionary force? Are you going to go back to your home country and tell your people that you haven’t achieved anything? Ridiculous. Loyal soldiers sacrificed their lives to win this war, and our people provided the supplies for this war. What are you going to tell them? You guys don’t deserve to be called generals!”

The rest of the leaders fell silent.

The duels went on the next day, and the day after. A Terra warrior occasionally lost their head, but three times as many warriors of the allied forces and Shellmount had their torsos cut off. The Terras achieved their goal of putting an end to the war between the allied forces and the Shellmounts.

On the fourth day, hundreds of Terra warriors sniffed the air.

“Ugor.”

“The wind smells like mud.”

Over the course of four days, one hundred Terras died. The dwindling number of warriors raised their heads to look across the field.

“I missed the smell of earth.”

“It’s the smell we bask in and roll around. ”

“It’s the scent of Goru.”

Their sense of smell was right. After a while, an army of about three thousand warriors slowly appeared beyond the horizon, with all the soldiers riding on their respective lions. Strange markings were drawn not only on the warriors but also on the lions. Perhaps because of the identical swirly markings, the warriors and lions looked like the limbs of a breathing creature.

The warrior in the lead blew his pipe. Only then did the soldiers of the multi-species alliance and Shellmounts stationed in Slimepolis look at the horizon.

The army was marching against the sun with the sound of pipes lasting unusually long. Some pipes were made from Shellmounts’ shells or Skians’ horns, while others were decorated with Puren skulls and Bloodborn fangs.

These were proof of battles previously won. At the frontline of the army was a Terra riding on a huge white lion.

The Viper said, “Wow, he’s not just the Great King. He’s a Demon King. Hey, Death King, you transcended the level of a demonic cult and raised a Demon King yourself. Congratulations.”

The chairman of the Fire Water Council, the head of all Terras, had arrived at the battlefield with his warriors to join the battle.

***

“Hello, everyone!”

Thuuuud!

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An ax as big as a supporting pillar was embedded in the middle of the battlefield. The Terra chairman put his foot on the back of the ax blade. His voice, enhanced by his aura, shook the heavens and earth.

“Creatures who sparkle in this world like stars! I’m Uburka, the 212th Chairman of the Fire Water Council!”

He seemed charismatic, and his muscles were eager to bulge out. There was a large scar on one side of his face, indicating he had a fair share of body counts. Uburka spread his arms wide and showed off his chest muscles, overwhelming the onlookers.

“I applaud your effort to continue your fucked up life!”

Although he seemed charismatic at first glance, his manner of speech proved me wrong.

“Not everyone can enjoy the blessings of life, but everyone enjoys life’s fuckeries. Although the seven species look different, we’re all compatriots who enjoy the same fate!”

My fellow Hunters murmured among themselves.

“What is ‘fuck’ supposed to be to Terras? Why are they saying ‘fuck’ so often?”

“I don’t know. It can mean anything or nothing.”

“Death King... Your teachings are truly... ”

I want to have a child who looks like Raviel. No, I just want to see Raviel. I can forget about having children. I don’t need one...

As I was trying hard to escape reality, Uburka’s speech gained momentum.

“Yes! We are compatriots! The soul of Terras resides in my left pectoral muscle and the love for my compatriots in my right pectoral muscle! Look! My chest muscles are full of soul and love!”

The analogy sucked really badly. In reality, seeing this guy’s bulging green muscles was nauseating. What the heck was wrong with this musclehead? He looked like the type of guy a passing orc would automatically yell “Big Brother!” toward.

The Hunters continued to comment on the sight.

“His flirting skills are abysmal...”

“The more I watch, the more he reminds me of the Death King...”

“I’m really not that bad!” I protested.

The multi-species alliance and the Shellmounts watched Uburka without chiming in. Even though the two sides were enemies, the soldiers of the two armies had similar looks on their faces, as if they stumbled upon a lunatic.

“But! I’m! So! Sad!” the lunatic yelled in agony. “Six hundred years ago, the Shellmounts committed an unforgivable crime, but how can exterminating a species be a way of forgiving it? It’s not right! It’s just not right! It’s not even beautiful! You’re waging war here in Slimepolis, which you call the Holy Land. It isn’t even holy! We, Terras, define this as a truly fucked up situation and declare our participation in the war!”

Following Uburka’s declaration, the Terra warriors raised their weapons.

“Fuck! Fuck!”

“Fuck!”

“Guys, listen to me!” the leader of the lunatics yelled toward the multi-species alliance. “You aren’t bad guys! Your ancestors suffered as the Shellmounts’ slaves, and you want to avenge your ancestors. The Shellmounts aren’t bad either! They’re fighting back because they don’t want to go extinct. There is not much to find fault in.”

The multi-species alliance forces and the Shellmounts were in turmoil. Everyone expressed their disbelief.

“What is that lunatic saying?”

“Did that fungus’ brain actually rot? Is it actually covered in fungi?”

The goblin leader continued, “That’s right! You aren’t bad guys! The Holy Land is the bad one!”

The multi-species alliance was rendered speechless. They looked at Uburka in complete shock.

“There is no god nor a holy land in this world, but you people decided to call this one a holy land and put your lingering feelings to rest in this place. You waste your lives away to prove your faith. This Holy Land is a bottomless hole where you’re pouring in your shiny lives. It’s entirely the Holy Land’s fault! Therefore, the Fire Water Council has made some decisions!”

The leaders of the allied forces were flustered. “What are you talking about... ”

Regardless, Uburka crossed his arms and declared, “We shall destroy the Holy Land!”

The leaders once again fell silent.

Uburka guffawed. “We can’t equally divide the Holy Land! If we do, we’ll just fight afterward! So let’s all join in and destroy the Holy Land! If you can’t let others have it, then let no one have it. Makes sense, right? Annihilate Slimepolis so that no one can occupy it or survive there! Now, my compatriots, let’s all destroy the Holy Land together and create a happy world for all of us!”

It was said that a tiger didn’t give birth to a dog[1]. The species I raised were now high-class wackos.

1. It's from a Korean saying, 호부견자. It's often used to call children who do worse than their parents, but it's also used to express people's admiration for children who excel. ☜