When Immortal Ascension Fails Time Travel to Try Again-Story 11 - How to Save a Sect in Six Simple Steps (9)

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I created two illusions of the stapes: one small, and the other, ten times the size. Next, I showed strands of energy slowly filling in the larger illusion in a microscopic lattice work. Once layered, it looked a lot like a stack of multi-walled carbon steel nanotubes layered within the large illusion of the bone.

As I continued my virtual demonstration, a pressure from the heavens caused my vision to turn dark until I finished filling in the first bone with layers of small spiritual energy nanotubes. That was when the pain intensified, and I practically went blind. I grabbed the edge of Noxious Fangstrike’s cauldron for support with my free hand.

I had to pause for a moment to let my vision clear and take a Lin’s Healing Dan.

Once I saw that my in-name disciple was focused on the example, I began to show the large illusory bone compressed into the small illusion. After compression, a weak white ‘immortal’ energy spread through the tiny bone and caused it to shine with a stunning iridescent light.

This was why they called it ‘condensing’ a bone. Without this compression, it would just be a complex pattern of energy.

Of course, that was when the full force of the heavens’ will crushed down on top of me. My head burned. The world blurred. A sour metallic taste filled my mouth before I coughed up five mouthfuls of blood.

Fuck me! That was worse than I thought.

I swiftly pulled my spiritual energy back inside my body.

If my soul knew this information better than most Immortal Ascension cultivators, why couldn’t my body take it when I talked about it?! Goddamn messed up Xianxia universe!

Frankly, I was in terrible shape, but I pretended I was fine by straightening my spine and using my cleaning technique to clear away my blood. “You get the idea.”

Noxious stood up. The medical bath water rolled off his red sleeves and dripped onto the simmering surface. He clasped his hands and bowed low.

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I backed up a step.

“I understand, master. Your lecture was incredible! This disciple won’t fail you. Please, go rest.”

This fucker. Maybe taking him in as an in-name disciple wasn’t the worst thing I’ve ever done.

I nodded. “I’ll take my leave then.”

There was more I wanted to remind him about. But, in the end, I couldn’t keep pushing myself by thinking of a cultivation stage three realms above mine. If I did, I was sure the heavens would actually kill me.

I clasped my hands behind my back like the master I was and turned around. ”If you don’t want me to steal your strange flames and kidnap Dread Lotus, make sure you come back alive and stronger.”

I glanced back. I could have sworn I saw the corners of his lips curl up.

That was to give him some peace of mind and encourage him to not fuck up. Unfortunately, I was in no condition to wait several hours for him to finish his bath, and then a few more while he gained enlightenment from it.

The issue was that, as his master, I couldn’t allow myself to be seen as weak. I stood tall as I stepped out of his alchemy room. Then I took another healing pill before I jumped onto my flying sword and swiftly rushed toward my immortal cave.

The healing pill didn’t do shit, which I knew because on the way over, I accidentally took out a bird. Or was it two? Also, I shaved off the tops of a few trees and cliffs here and there. It had been hard to focus. But the important part was that I looked mean and malicious instead of what I was, which was about to collapse.

***

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When I woke up on the damp grass beside Fairy Lake, I frowned. Wasn’t this where I’d barely managed to drag myself after reaching my residence? By the time I crashed into my immortal cave, I hadn’t had the presence of mind to teleport myself directly to my bed and just entered the space.

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My head pounded like a thousand horses had trampled across it. It hurt worse than when I left the alchemy room.

Fuck. I didn’t want to move. This was worse than a hangover. It was a defy-the-heavens-over.

Okay, that was bad. If I was making jokes that terrible, I definitely could use a hand.

Without moving my head, I glanced around to see the gold dragon and Ghosty McGhostFace diligently training. Xiao Bai napped under the gazebo. Little Spring squatted down with a trowel in his hands and planted another spiritual wheat seedling in the field.

Fuck. Why hadn’t anyone moved me to my room?

Wait, I probably hadn’t been laying there for more than ten minutes.

Little Spring jumped and turned around. “Oh! Sister Lin, you’re back.”

He pulled off his gloves and ran toward me.

What was the right medicine to take in this situation where a Lin’s Healing Dan didn’t work? A certain turquoise translucent pain relieving pill?

I used the telepathic technique to send the kid the recipe, then fell back asleep.

The next time I woke up, it was to see Little Spring staring down at me with a worried frown. He held a white jade bottle in his hand.

He must have already given me a pill because my brain no longer felt like it was being squeezed and left out to dry. Just poked at a little.

It was good to have an intelligent junior martial brother who could create any of the pills I told him to.

”Are you feeling better?”

To show that I was fine, I jumped to my feet. The world spun. My headache returned like someone had put a spike in my skull. The kid had to grab my arm to steady me. I ended up leaning on him for support.

His eyes grew wide. No, it was more than that. He looked extremely worried.

Shit. The side effects of my lecture lasted longer than I thought. The heavens really had it out for me this time. What did I ever do to them, huh? Aside from maybe cursing out the original author of this universe near daily.

I held out my hand. “Another.”

He shakily handed me the jade bottle, and I poured two more pills into my mouth. I cycled the pain-relieving energy towards my head.

”Sister Lin, taking three of those so close together can’t be good for you.”

I grimaced. We had spiritual spring water, so I’d be fine.

He bit his lip. ”How did you end up this bad?”

Hadn’t I already explained that to this kid? Well, whatever.

I continued to lean on him like he was a human crutch. “I merely showed Noxious how to create an immortal bone. Just an immortal bone! And they kicked my ass for it! It wasn’t like I taught him heavenly laws. Pssh. Assholes.”

“Who?”

“The heavens. Assholes. All of them.”

He nodded because what I said made perfect sense.

“But, do you know?”

He shook his head.

“That lecture I gave would be impossible for anyone else, even if they were at Immortal Ascension. Muahahaha! I am such a fucking genius!”

The pain spiked. I pushed away from him and dug my fingers into my temples.

Those assholes really fucked up my brain. Or maybe... “Being so brilliant can hurt like a bitch.”

He patted my back. “Sure, Sister Lin.”

The world shifted around me until I saw the kitchen. Little Spring helped me sit down. Of course, I immediately rested my head on the table like a student trying to sleep in class.

”You look so pale. I’ll… I’ll make you something. Maybe a medicinal meal will help.” The kid mumbled while stepping from side to side, “Headaches! What are good for headaches?”

Eventually, he brought out a large amount of spiritual ingredients that included a slice of spiritual salmon, Crimson Blood Rice, Golden Walnuts, Five Slaps Turmeric, and Sweet Star Spinach. He worked diligently to bring out the flavors and combine the spices.

And I closed my eyes.

The next thing I knew, a hand touched my shoulder, waking me. I grabbed the offending wrist and gathered my energy to attack. When I realized it was just Little Spring, I froze.

Ah, the side effects of being too good were worse than I thought.

The kid’s eyebrows furrowed.

Ha! I would be fine. This was nothing. Cultivators lived to defy the heavens!

I patted his hand and let go of his arm.

He bit his lip before saying, ”Sister Lin, please try this.” He gestured to the table where he’d set various dishes in a formation that somehow reminded me of the characters for ‘healthy.’ It smelled amazing. Maybe even a little too intense, especially the turmeric.

I cleared my throat. “You worked hard.”

I started eating. Thanks to the ingredients he used, there was no medicinal flavor. The salmon tasted sweet because of the ginger, walnuts, and the sauce he’d whipped up on the fly using spiritual soy sauce and extract from the Sweet Star Spinach.

I noticed the kid examining me with his divine sense while I ate. Since he was worried and likely curious to see if the dish he created actually helped me, I ignored him.

Once I’d finished my meal, the healing properties of the ingredients had melded together with the energies from the three pills I had taken earlier. When they combined, they resolved the underlying issue.

I closed my eyes. Finally, sweet freedom from pain.

”Are you feeling better?”

I nodded and smoothed the kid’s hair back. “You did good.”

”Sister Lin!” He put both hands on the table in front of me and leaned over excitedly. “I think I know how immortal cooking can replace the bath treatment!”

“How?”

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”Just now, when the energies from my dishes and your pills combined, they had a much more powerful but soothing effect on your body. It was more than just one of them alone. If I use the edible herbs from your original solution in a dish and you turn the rest of the alchemical ingredients into a pill, it may work better than just a bath and acupuncture.”

I thought about how the energies affected each other just now. I really wouldn’t have improved so fast without the dishes Little Spring cooked. And if we did this and that… “It just might do the job.”

Alright! It was time to fulfill the promise I made to the kid for losing the earlier bet.

***

”Sister Lin! I figured it out this time! I can feel it!”

“I doubt it.” We’d been toiling for the past four hours on creating a pill and meal combo that both performed well and satisfied the pallet.

So far, the best thing we developed was our third dish, the one I helped with by throwing the alchemy ingredients into a pot with spiritual chicken bone stock and salt. It was a soup that worked together with a medicine I concocted. After taking a tiny bite with a shaving of the new pill I designed, it had successfully improved Little Spring’s condition a minuscule amount, as I knew it would!

The issue was that it tasted so terrible that the kid almost threw up. He stated, if this were the only solution, he would rather suffer through the bath. He even glared at me and told me that I was never allowed to help him throw in the ingredients ever again, even if they were alchemical ingredients.

After that, we experimented by creating over fifty dishes, ten at a time. Each one either didn’t work or smelled so awful the little chef refused to even try it.

He even accused me of being cursed when it came to immortal cooking! Me! Of course, I pointed out that it wasn’t that I couldn’t learn to cook. I just refused to. Which earned me a look that said, ‘You refused to learn because you’re cursed, right?’

Fucking brat.

But, seriously, was I... was I actually a cursed cook?

Naw. How could that be when I made perfectly good extracts for Little Spring to use? This one time was just a fluke. Probably.

All his experimenting went through the herbs he prepared, and he even began to use up my stash of medical ingredients. I was not happy. Especially since there were other things I needed to do in order to prepare for war.

Little Spring grinned. “How about we make a bet?”

“Another one? I thought you wanted me to stop gambling?”

His cheeks turned pink. “But I enjoy winning. I have a feeling I’ll beat you this time.”

“Nah, I think I’m done betting against you.”

“Come on! Please, Sister Lin.”

Did he have to look so adorable?

I crossed my arms and raised both eyebrows. “Tell me the stakes first.”