I Want to Slack Off at the Demon Bureau - Chapter 69 - 0

A terrible calamity has fallen onto Zhang Fan, not only becoming one of the three survivors of Grass Temple Village, where everyone else was horribly massacred, he was also tasked to carry one of the most evil artifacts, the Sinister Bead, and taught one of the most secret teachings of the Skysong Sect, the Brahmin Wisdom. Now he cultivates in the Jadeon Sect, his knowledge and possession will draw him into a chaotic story where he will have to carry some of the greatest burdens of the Martial World.

When I woke up, I had been reborn as a baby. My mother passed away and I was neglected by my father. Even though I was born in a Marquis family, my life started on a HARD MODE. But I won’t be discouraged. I will eat well, sleep well, move much, get whatever I can get and live happily.

Upon waking, Wang Shan finds himself in Room 888, the most luxurious accommodation in Cloud City, typically reserved for the wealthiest. Despite his complaints about the “”subpar”” room, five stunning women are waiting to inform him of his first-place assurance in an upcoming test due to his powerful father’s influence.A stranger to this world from the 21st century, Wang Shan learns that martial prowess is paramount, categorized into nine realms. Today, he must take the One-star Cultivator test, despite his supposed lack of innate talent. His father’s status as the ruler and a formidable Two-star Expert guarantees his victory, but the arrival of the gifted Zhang Bao poses a deadly challenge.As Wang Shan bathes, he hears a voice in his mind: “”System binding, binding successful.”” A powerful trading system allows him to trade anything he touches, enabling him to instantly advance his cultivation. With newfound power, Wang Shan contemplates his next move. Will he overcome the threats and rise to greatness with the help of his mysterious system?

My end was not majestic, my beginning was not beautiful, but I will make damn sure that I rise once more. No more shall I bend a knee, no more shall I hide, no more shall I cower. No more shall the light guild my path, for only Darkness remains.

***

Killed by the universe's greatest killer, Truck-Kun. My existence was twisted as I gazed up at King-Yama, staring down at me with revulsion, “You sick bastard, you ate people.” He bellowed, glaring at me with disgust.

Snorting, I gathered my courage raising my head high and proud, my voice carrying a hint of pride, “So what, have you ever tried it...Let me ask you, have you ever had sex.”

A bewildered expression hung on his rugged appearance as he absentmindedly nodded. A slight smirk crossed my face as I declared, “then have you ate ass,”

“WHAT!!!” He balled in panic, shivering like a guilty man on trial.

“HAHA, you call me disgusting, but it appears you were sucking ass, now that is truly disgusting. I don't judge, but if you ask me, I will stick to cannibalism.”

“THAT NOT A FAIR COMPARISON, YOU LITTLE SHIT,”